Confessions of an Over-Analyzer

For years I've surfed the web, read countless blogs of others, and rarely commented beyond a word or two of agreement or encouragement. Heck, I even started a few blogs myself only to have them dissolve into the abyss of the thousands of other "dead" web pages.

You see, I have always had the best of intentions in these ventures, but alas, I am typically way too analytical. I guess I have feared saying something that someone would dislike, disagree with, be offended by, or that they would use my words to make an unfair assessment of my character, theology, etc. Plus, my grammar and punctuation sucks! (hopefully, the word "sucks" doesn't offend anyone, but if it does I must apologize twice, because I said it twice).

In the end, I want to love and be loved. I don't want to hurt people or stir up unnecessary disagreements. You name it. I've got hundreds of excuses why I don't speak up in the virtual community or even in real community for that matter. I inevitably either over analyze everything or shut it off entirely.

I know. I know. Probably not the healthiest thing, but it's me.

So, what i am really trying to get to is this: If this weblog thing is not your cup of tea. Well, it was not my cup of tea first - since i am older than most of you, except Pat. Sorry Pat.

I am trying to make several changes in my life in areas that are out of balance - extending trust, giving love outside my comfort zone, not taking advantage of the love of the ones inside my comfort zone, lightening up on sarcasm (that's a tough one), and others, especially as it relates to biblical humility - looking to Christ as the example of perfection in that regard.

I would like to propose something - not in vain conceit or selfish ambition, though it will help me considerably, but for the benefit of all of us individually and as a community. Here goes:

What would happen if we committed to write and read things (and speak to each other in person) with the understanding and agreement that 1) we are all imperfect human beings, 2) we are all ardent followers of Jesus Christ, 3) we will speak/write in the spirit of phillipians 2:3 - we will "do NOTHING out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than (y)ourselves", and 4) we will give each other the benefit of the doubt FIRST, before assuming otherwise.

What I mean is, when something is said (real community) or written (virtual community) that hurts or is confusing, we first refer to our agreement that we FIRST assume the person saying those things did not mean them to be hurtful or confusing, because they are communicating NOT in selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in a spirit of seeing us as better than themselves. Thus, their words were meant for either our edification, challenge, accountability, or the bettering of our relationship. If I have taken them otherwise, it is FIRST assumed by me that I've misunderstood, thus i need to approach them to clear up confusion.

Taking it to the next step, if I am the first person and someone approaches me for clarification, I also FIRST assume that there is NO selfish ambition or vain conceit in the other's approaching me, but only that which is for my edification, challenge, accountability, or the bettering of our relationship.

Hopefully this all makes a small bit of sense. All I ask at this point is that you read this a couple times, pray about how our team can grow with an embracing of Phillipians 2:3, continue talking with me about this, and hold me accountable in my desire for biblical humility, as I will you. Also comment at will.

craig